Saturday, June 11, 2016

An Open Letter To Mrs Turner about her son, Brock

Here's a little FYI for you "Mom" (or "Dad" - which ever one of you posted the travesty on Facebook declaring him some sort of "kind" and "compassionate" person just like the rest of us.) :

No, your son is NOT  a person Just Like Me
Your son isn't a victim of someone else's "indiscretion" and self entitlement. 
Your son CREATED a Victim Just Like Me.

Don't talk to me - to the World - about how Kind and Compassionate your "little angel" is.  Talk to me about how You failed to teach him to be responsible for his own actions.  Talk to me about why you're trying to excuse his actions - his incredibly reprehensible actions.  Talk to me about why you expect His Victim to be held responsible for HIS ACTIONS.

Your son doesn't deserve my Consideration or Compassion or Kindness or Understanding.  He forfeited the right to ANY of those things when he created another victim of sexual assault.

The person who deserves THOSE things - compassion, consideration, kindness, understanding, support, respect, gratitude for a willingness not to let this get swept under the rug to protect the reputation of a Somebody Sports Star..... those are reserved for his Victim. 

Those things - my compassion and understanding and support - are reserved for the innocent woman he Damaged with HIS ACTIONS.  Not hers.  HIS.

The person I Identify with - is not and will Never Be - some rich brat with a sense of entitlement attempting to dodge responsibility for what he did, and boo-hooing that he's now got to face the consequences of HIS ACTIONS after getting Caught and Tried By A Jury Of His Peers.. 

No.  Just NO.
I identify with his Victim.  A woman, just like me, who will go through the rest of her life saying to herself, "if I had just stayed home..." the same way that I've said that to myself for more than 30 years, after agreeing to Tutor someone for an upcoming test.  Not go to a party, or get drunk, or even go on a Date - just to go tutor someone who was having trouble with a class that I was doing well in, because back then I was nice like that..
I identify with his Victim.  A woman just like me, who will go through the rest of her life second guessing every decision she makes, and examining it for the potential to be abused by someone else - someone who, like your son, doesn't want to accept responsibility for their own deplorable actions.  Just like I have second guessed myself for more than 30 years, when I've had the courage to admit to the rape that happened to me.  Usually I just keep my mouth shut because I don't generally have the courage to pick at the scabs this much.

I identify with his Victim.  A woman just like me, who had a promising career, and dreams about the future - who will now forever carry emotional scar tissue, have trust issues, and have to deal with people like YOU making sick excuses for their "little angel." - just like I still carry the hidden scars from shattered dreams and being told the one time I was brave enough to bluntly say something about it in right after it happened that I must have done Something to cause him to act that way - because he was Such a Great Guy and showed So Much Promise as an Athlete - assuming I wasn't simply making it up out of jealousy or because I wasn't one of the popular kids that he hung out with.

I identify with his Victim. A woman just like me, who now has to put the shattered pieces of her life back together, and spend the next 50 or 60 years looking at the pieces of a figurative broken mirror, wondering why it doesn't show the same reflection that it used to show.

As a Parent, I understand that he is your offspring and therefore you will always love him. We love our children unconditionally, even when they're such pieces of dung we have to wonder if they are changelings left by evil trolls from fairy tales.

As a Woman - I sincerely hope you never have to go through the sort of devastation that young woman has gone through at your son's hands. The sort of devastation that *I went through almost 40 years ago, that I Still deal with some of the after effects even now. The devastation and emotional scaring that SHE will be dealing with when she's 50.

As a SURVIVOR - Your "little angel" will Never have paid Enough. He will NEVER have Suffered Enough. 
May Fate And Karma Deliver To Him Exactly What He Deserves and Not One Thing He Desires.